HolOddities 2

Continuing the Weird Christmas Traditions for your entertainment.

Mary Lwyd of Wales

• Estonia: The whole family hits the sauna on Christmas Eve.
• Wales: Someone is chosen to play Mari Lywd who walks through town with the skull of a horse on a stick. I'm baffled by this one.
• Iceland: I like this one. If an Icelander doesn't get new clothes before Christmas, the killer mountain Yule cat eats them. 
• Czech Republic: Desperate for marriage it seems. Czech ladies throw a shoe over one shoulder from the door way. The direction the shoe is pointed determines if they'll be married in the coming year.
• Sweden: Authorities in the village of Gävle decided to install a straw goat statue in the town square. Every other year, somebody burns it down before Christmas. Both are fine traditions.
• Sweden (again): Rice pudding is standard fare for dessert. The Christmas special has an almond buried somewhere in it. The lucky person who finds it will supposedly get married within a year. I assume only single folks of marrying age have a go at the pudding.
• Great Britain: Speaking of puddings, tradition calls for each member of the household to stir the pudding in a clockwise direction while making a wish. I guess that's better than a lump of coal.
• Italy: A witch named Befana is the deliverer of presents to children (not that stodgy Santa). But the kids have to wait for the blessings of Befana until January 6th.
• Ethiopia: Christian Ethiopians celebrate Christmas on January 7th. Everybody wears white and the guys play ganna, a fast pace game of ... hockey?

More weird stuff coming here in the next few days.

How about a complete series about the Witches of Galdorheim for a Christmas present? The compendium of the four books and one short story of Kat's adventures learning her witch powers is now available in a single ebook. However, all the separate books are also in print. All are available through:

Amazon, of course

The books and stories are:

BAD SPELLING (Book 1): A klutzy witch, a shaman's curse, a quest to save her family. Can Kat find her magic in time?

MIDNIGHT OIL (Book 2): Shipwrecked on a legendary island, how can a witch rescue her boyfriend if she can’t even phone home?

SCOTCH BROOM (Book 3): A magical trip to Stonehenge lands a witch in the Otherworld where an ancient goddess is up to no good.

BLOOD TIES TESTED (Book 4): Written by popular demand of readers who want to know what happens to Rune after the Book 3 conclusion. Unfortunate events lead a half vampire boy into indulging his vampire side, leaving him with regret and sadness. Can dear old Dad help him forgive himself?

Spellslinger (Prequel Short Story): Written by popular demand of readers who adore Kat's smart-aleck brother. It's a short story prequel to the Witches series dedicated to Kat's brother, Rune. A super speller, he's plagued with his half-vampire heritage. This story gives a bit more of his trials growing up on the Witches' Island.

Smashwords End of Year Sale

Now is your best chance to find my entire ebook collection for a promotional price at @Smashwords as part of their 2024 End of Year Sale! Find my books and many more at https://www.smashwords.com/shelves/promos/ through January 1! #SmashwordsEoYSale #Smashwords

For a list of just MY books, click this link:

https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/Marva_Dasef

HolOddities 1

Christmas, Noel, Jul. A pagan holiday preempted by Christian monks to make their story more palatable to the heathens. Well, Christmas is even weirder than that. Check out Christmas traditions around the world you might not know. Then, look at the bottom of this post to get the links to my book which is the absolutely most fantastically wonderful present you can buy for cheap. Trust me. Aunt Mabel will love it. So, on to the weird with this from Faux Channel. TALES OF A TEXAS BOY is just the right present for that hard-to-shop-for relative.

Mattak from Greenland

• Greenland: Their own version of a Turducken is a Mattak. That's raw whale skin served with blubber) or Kiviak: 500 Auk birds stuffed into a sealskin and fermented for 7 months. I think I'll skip Greenland's Christmas.
• South Africa: Sauteed caterpillar of the Emperor Moth is a Christmas treat.
• Austria: Krampus! See my previous post on the esteemed Christmas guy worse than the Grinch.
• Catalonia: The Nativity scenes include a picture of a pooping man. Um. Along with the pooping guy, they have a pooping log. Now, I don't know about you, but I think Catalonia got too much bug spray sometime in the past.
• Norway: Brooms are hidden away so witches can't claim possession. What's a witch without a broom? Kelly Conway?
• Japan: The dine-out place of choice is KFC. Makes sense to me.
• Venezuela: The religious go to Mass on roller skates.
• Germany: They hide a pickle in the Christmas tree. The kid who finds it gets an extra gift. Also, kids leave a sneaker outside to be stuffed with candy. Bad kinder get a twig instead.
• New Zealand: Not so weird, they use a Pohutukawa tree rather than the standard Douglas fir. They're actually kind of pretty with red flowers.
• Portugal: The Deceased are invited to dinner and have places set at the table for them. What the heck? They don't eat much.
• Ukraine: Trees are decorated with an artificial spider and a bunch of spider web. Sounds like the Trump Whitehouse decor.
• Czech Republic: Desperate for marriage it seems. Czech ladies throw a shoe over one shoulder from the doorway. The direction the shoe is pointed determines if they'll be married in the coming year.

More weird stuff coming here in the next couple of weeks.

Now, back to my book, which is much more important.

• It's nostalgic
• It doesn't have any sex (well, there is that thing with the jackass)
• It's in LARGE PRINT
• It's funny
• It's poignant
• It has lots of animals
• It's a bargain in the books section

Buy the Large Print at Amazon for only $7.99 and make everybody happy. Now isn't that a better gift than a necktie? Oh, you can also get the book for your Kindle or for your listening pleasure in audio format. Gotcha covered for Christmas.

Amazon Kindle Ebook $.99 

Other Ebook Formats at Smashwords
Large Print Paperback $7.99 at Amazon

Regular Print Paperback $3.99 at Amazon

Large Print Hard Cover $13.99 at Amazon

Add-on Audio book for Kindle

Audio Book at Audible - Free if you're a subscriber

Little Eddie tells some almost true Tall Tales set in West Texas of the 1930s. Guess what's true and what Eddie fudged on. Was it about the bear? Cage McNatt's prize sow? The skunk in the corn patch? Guaranteed for a chuckle and maybe a tear here and there.

The Legend of Krampus

We all love Santa Claus (or Santa Claws from "Nightmare Before Christmas"), but leave us not forget the adorable Krampus. 

After all, without Krampus, bad children wouldn't just get coal in their stocking, but they'd also be kidnapped, thrown into a sack, and eaten by the lovely Krampus. The Grinch ain't got nothin' on Krampus. 

 Here's some stuff from Wikipedia: In folklore, Krampus is a horned, anthropomorphic figure described as "half-goat, half-demon", who, during the Christmas season, punishes children who have misbehaved, in contrast with Saint Nicholas, who rewards the well-behaved with gifts. 

 Krampus is one of the companions of Saint Nicholas in several countries including Austria, Bavaria, Croatia, Czech Republic, Hungary, Slovenia, South Tyrol and parts of Northern Italy. The origin of the figure is unclear; some folklorists and anthropologists have postulated its pre-Christian origin. In traditional parades and in such events as the Krampuslauf (English: Krampus run), young men dressed as Krampus participate; such events occur annually in most European countries. 

 As evil as jolly Saint Krampus is, his role of getting naughty children to behave has worked wonders in the Slavic areas of Europe. And, of course, buy my books. And, of course, you probably won't.

The Real Christmas Boogieman

 Credit to Tony Lagarto for the story of Hans Trapp

This is Hans Trapp, a legendary boogieman from the Alsace and Lorraine regions of France. He accompanies Santa Claus to punish naughty children at Christmas. While Santa delivers presents and gifts, Hans Trapp delivers beatings.

The Christmas legend of Hans Trapp is based on a real German knight, and begins with a wealthy man stealing people’s money and partying so hard that the Pope ex-communicates him. The story goes that Trapp then sells his soul to the devil to pursue a life of sin, which naturally forces him into a hobby of eating human flesh, as such a one is wont to do. Banished from society for being a skeevy creep, he lived alone in the woods and dressed as a scarecrow, stuffing straw into his clothes and at times wearing a black cloak. He spends his time trying to lure children into the woods so he can eat them.

One day after roasting a shepherd boy over a fire (or just getting ready to, the legend goes back and forth on this one), God decided enough was enough and struck Trapp down with a lightning bolt that split his head open.

But that didn’t stop this cannibal – he got a new gig helping Saint Nicholas out by keeping naughty kids in line.

Some accounts of Hans Trapp paint him in a rosier light (could there be any that are darker?), saying that he regrets his life of sin. In these versions, he visits misbehaving children dressed as a scarecrow and tries to persuade them to be more virtuous than he was, usually by scaring them into it.

But other stories, in classic creepy Christmas fashion, say he goes around marking the children he wants to eat on Christmas Eve.

The German knight this legend is based on was named Hans Von Trotha and was born in 1450. Apparently, he didn’t really do any of the stuff mentioned in the legend, except get into a war against an abbey, which led to him being ex-communicated by the Pope. But who really cares about those pesky factual details when you can just scare the crap out of your kids on Christmas instead?