Tuesday, January 08, 2019

Goodbye, Lorrie

Lorrie in Happier Times
My dear friend, Lorrie, died yesterday. She’d been having a lot of health problems, one piled on top of another. The final straw was lung cancer. She already had lung problems with a fairly rare disease of the lungs which required her to carry around oxygen with her. Between the two diseases in the same organs, she didn’t have much time left. She told me about this latest diagnosis in early November. She had maybe six weeks, the doctor said. Well, she didn’t get much more than that, but I really don’t think she wanted any extra weeks.


She had her family gathered around her and she peacefully passed away on January 5th. A mutual friend who lived near her let me know.
It’s always sad to lose a loved one. The funny thing is that Lorrie and I have known each other for around ten years, but we never met face to face. Only toward the end did we even speak on the phone. I’m not a good speaker (I don’t get much practice), so I was trying to convince her to at least keep her email account open. But, no, she was done with it.
A lot of people condemn the internet for making close friendships too difficult. You know what? Lorrie and I beg to differ. We stayed in constant contact and even worked together on writing projects for those many years. I first met her in an on-line critique group. When the group went off in a different direction, many of us dropped out, but stayed in touch. Liz, Lorrie, Emmy for sure and most likely several more who I’m still in contact with, but many have wandered off in other directions.
I’m going to miss Lorrie a lot. She was funny, loving, and kind. She had many, many friends. However, she told very few people of her health situation. I asked her if I could privately contact a few we’d known together for years, but she said she didn’t want anybody to know, so I swore a vow of silence.
When she did pass on, I put up a post on her page in Facebook to let everybody know. I especially want to thank Darla for being my liaison in Lorrie’s town. She visited her often and passed along information to me through Facebook messaging. See. The evil internet helped us see Lorrie through her last few weeks even though she had dropped out of any email or posting.
I don’t know what will happen with Lorrie’s books she still has on sale on Amazon and other places. I imagine her publisher will arrange something with Lorrie’s daughter to either continue selling the books or unpublish them. I hope they don’t do that. Her series on a wacky old lady who grants dead people their last wishes is a total hoot. Lorrie always said she was Winnie in those books (Call On the Dead Series).
A few months back, I tried to get her to do one more Winnie book and I’d collaborate. I even volunteered to be the dead person. We were trying to come up with a really good last wish. Not magical wishes, but practical things like letting the family know where the deceased had hidden the family jewels. That kind of thing.
She also wrote a western involving a shy sheriff and a thieving monkey. Again with the funny business.
So, good-bye, my friend. Damn you for not finishing the Winnie book we were doing together. You weren’t the one who was supposed to die. Then, you could call on me and make it all better.
See her books on Amazon. I’m sure you’ll like Winnie’s tales in “The Call on the Dead Club” anthology.

Sunday, January 06, 2019

Final Free Day for Blood Ties Tested

BLOOD TIES TESTED FREE ON AMAZON JANUARY 6TH

Unfortunate events lead a half vampire boy into indulging his vampire side, leaving him with regret and sadness. Can dear old Dad help him forgive himself?

Following the events in the series Witches of Galdorheim, this additional tale relates what happens to Katrina the Witch's younger brother, Rune. Half vampire and half warlock, he faces life with a wisecrack and some powerful magic. Whatever happens, he does not want to be a vampire like his father. Unfortunate events lead him to fatally call on his vampire half. This failure leaves him in anguish. How can he assuage the guilt he feels? His mother thinks he needs to visit dead old dad, a vampire residing in the Tatras Mountains of Slovakia.




Saturday, January 05, 2019

Free Book Days Today and Tomorrow

BLOOD TIES TESTED FREE ON AMAZON JANUARY 5TH-6TH

Unfortunate events lead a half vampire boy into indulging his vampire side, leaving him with regret and sadness. Can dear old Dad help him forgive himself?

Following the events in the series Witches of Galdorheim, this additional tale relates what happens to Katrina the Witch's younger brother, Rune. Half vampire and half warlock, he faces life with a wisecrack and some powerful magic. Whatever happens, he does not want to be a vampire like his father. Unfortunate events lead him to fatally call on his vampire half. This failure leaves him in anguish. How can he assuage the guilt he feels? His mother thinks he needs to visit dead old dad, a vampire residing in the Tatras Mountains of Slovakia.




Friday, January 04, 2019

Sue Perkins Asks the Questions

(Free Book Special January 5th and 6th - See the end of the post for details.)

And I do my best to answer them. Sue is a fantasy writer from one of the most fantastical places on earth: New Zealand. Yeah, her neighbors are definitely hobbits.

Sue (brave woman) is starting a Friday Focus feature on her blog telling the world about authors she's bumped into over the years. Since I was the only person not completely wrapped up in Christmas wrapping, I jumped up waving my hand to let her know I'd be happy to go first just to kick things off.

Visit SUE PERKINS, AUTHOR blog today January 4th, but it's probably already January 5th where she lives.

About Sue

Hi, I'm Sue and I grew up in Devon, England. My husband and I spent some years travelling the world before starting a family. In 1986 we emigrated to New Zealand and subsequently became New Zealand citizens. My children are now the world travellers while my husband and I live at the top of New Zealand’s South Island. My interests include writing, reading, genealogy and aqua jogging.

To check out Sue's books, click to her Amazon Author page for the full list. She writes fantasy stories for kids like I do. I guess that's why we've stayed in contact for so many years. My favorite of Sue's books is the Dragon World series. She's got a handy box set available on Amazon for a bargain price of $3.99 for all three books.

Dragon Flames tells how Talei and Adri rescue the dragons and save her people at the same time.

Dragon Clans is Sie and Byron's story. Together they solve the problem of the fighting dragon clans.

Dragon Ice is the story of Neisha and Tane's rescue of Neisha' people who are being held captive by the Ice Dragons.





BLOOD TIES TESTED FREE ON AMAZON JANUARY 5TH-6TH
Unfortunate events lead a half vampire boy into indulging his vampire side, leaving him with regret and sadness. Can dear old Dad help him forgive himself?

Following the events in the series Witches of Galdorheim, this additional tale relates what happens to Katrina the Witch's younger brother, Rune. Half vampire and half warlock, he faces life with a wisecrack and some powerful magic. Whatever happens, he does not want to be a vampire like his father. Unfortunate events lead him to fatally call on his vampire half. This failure leaves him in anguish. How can he assuage the guilt he feels? His mother thinks he needs to visit dead old dad, a vampire residing in the Tatras Mountains of Slovakia.

Wednesday, January 02, 2019

Resolutions 2019

Hey, I actually did accomplish one of my 2018 Resolutions. I finished writing and published the 4th book in the Witches of Galdorheim series. "Blood Ties Tested" is now being ignored with the same fervor as the rest of the series. Nothing ever changes except the date. The whole series is now bundled on Amazon. A pretty good discount applies if you buy the entire set at one go.

For 2019, I resolve to study the requirements for living out my life in some other country. I don't need citizenship, just a semi-permanent resident status. Suggestions gladly accepted.

What about you? Are you making any resolutions? If so, do you have any I might contemplate borrowing since I can't think of anything else on my own.

Oh, right. Happy Birthdays coming up this month:

January 5th: My brother, Darrel (no, I don't have another brother named Daryl). Here's a great shot of Darrel as the Eclipse King from 2017. Everybody got to wear the crown at some point or other, so he shouldn't get a swelled head.

January 16th: My longest running time friend, Beth Aylworth. I found this old picture from back in the days when we all played league darts. Eventually, Beth and her husband, Chuck, moved to Salem. No more darts, but we're all still friends.

January 25th: My hubby, Jack Dasef. Here he is on one of our visits to London. We've since visited a number of other countries. We cruised around the Grecian Isles, then hit Ireland and Scotland. That was barely a taste test, so we definitely need to go back. But the Panama Canal calls and I still want to go below the Antarctic circle since I've been north of the Arctic circle. The symmetry would be pleasing.

Monday, December 31, 2018

January Restores Sanity to the House

Political post, just so's you know.

When the House members are sworn in on January 3rd (HAPPY NEW USA), they will be able to keep Mueller at post investigating the Trump Crime Cartel. I hope the have the guts to go after them pincer and tong. The Republicans have overseen the destruction of the country by giving into the obviously insane and demented Trump.

So, all I can say is that I HOPE the Democrats play every card they have to stop Trump's raging path of insanity.

You think Trump is doing okay? Then, do not read this blog. Go away and suck poisonous frogs. You are demented and do not deserve any say in the running of this country.

Okay, back to Happy New Year. I'd better see a change, a HUGE change, for the better in 2019. Trump should not be allowed to continue his destructive reign, but Dems have to double-down and get tough when they have even a modicum of control.

Let's see, what would be an appropriate graphic for this post? I kind of like Trump behind bars serving a life sentence for multiple crimes against the US and humanity.


Monday, December 24, 2018

Thoughts for the Season

I saw a post the other day in which the author (and the re-poster) believed they were opening their arms to the world in celebration of the turn from Winter to Spring. I've used their "talking points" to make my own list for the Season. Take it or leave it.


OK Folks, Let's get this straightened out...

  • Santa is a mythical character based on a variety of legends and fairy tales. 
  • "Baby, It's Cold Outside" could be considered offensive by any person held against their will.
  • Candy canes are canes, with no relationship to the Hebrew Y in Yeshua.
  • We say anything pertaining to our reason for the season. After all, there are 6 billion non-Christians in the world.
  • Children should get to decorate their classrooms in their seasonally appropriate decorations of the creed or culture.
  • There were 3 wise men, but 3 wise women would have brought nappies, a casserole, and a warm blanket.
  • Babies Yashua, Mithra, Tammuz, Adonis, Attis, and Osiris all claimed the same virgin birth and rising from death stories.
  • Mommy was probably not kissing a mythological being (see above), but either her husband or lover. The song does not specify.
  • Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, being a creature pulling a mythical conveyance by a mythical being is best sung by Burl Ives.
  • Stop turning the holidays into a political bludgeon to claim discrimination with such nonsense as a war on Christmas.
  • Let kids be kids. Let kids not be told they're bad if they are Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist or any other cultural religion and don't believe in the Germanic Jul traditions.
  • This is one of the MANY times of the year we should all be nicer to each other and forget everything that tears us apart from our one great commonality: being human.
  • You can say Merry Christmas or Happy Hanakkuh, or any other greeting you want, including just Happy Holidays or Bah Humbug.

Friday, December 21, 2018

Holiday Languages Revealed

Here are the languages cobbled together in some cases to wish holiday greetings. Those who made a correct guess are listed. If you've won, but I don't have your email address to send you your audio book prize, DM me in either Facebook or G+. 
  1. Glædelig Jul og Godt Nytår!  Danish
  2. Feliz Navidad y Próspero Año Nuevo! , Spanish
  3. Schéi Feierdeeg an e Gudde Neit Joer!  Luxembourgish
  4. Eguberri eta Urteberri On! Basque
  5. Meli Hollidei Mich Saehae Bog Manh-i Bad-euseyo! Korean
  6. Na Laethanta Saoire Merry Agus an Bhliain Nua Shona!  Irish
  7. Limnandi Zeeholide Kunye NoNyaka Omtsha Onoyolo! Xhosa
  8. Veseli Praznitsi i Chestita Nova Godina!  Bulgarian
  9. Aleatalat Milad Saeid Wasanat Jadidat Saeida! Arabic
  10. Mafaro Mazororo uye Nyaya Itsva Inofara! Shona
  11. Shwinlaann Saw Aarrlautraat Myarr Nhaint Main g Lar Nhaitsait! Burmese
  12. Leholo Tsa Phomolo le Selemo se Secha se Thabile! Southern Sotho
  13. Lebedik Holidays aun Mzl Niu Yar! Yiddish
  14. Meera Chhuttiyaan aur Naya Saal Mbaarak Ho! Hindi
  15. Merry Holidays and Happy New Year!  English
  16. HAPPY SATCHRPANGANHANKWANASH!  Language: Short-hand for the holidays Saturnalia, Christmas, Panga Ganapi, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Ashura. 
  17. Read all about these celebrations here.
Interested in reading any of my zany books? Find them all on my Amazon Author Page.

Thursday, December 20, 2018

Happy or Merry (Word of Your Choice)

Here are some variations in several languages for expressing greetings for the holidays. Guess the language of each. Some are easy; some might not be recognized by a native speaker of the language since I had to transliterate into the English alphabet. That makes some of them pretty darned hard to figure out.

Here's the complete list of phrases. I'll fill in the languages on or after the 25th. I want everybody to have a shot at wishing others happiness and joy in many different languages. All of us, of course, speaking the human language of love. Well, most of us anyway.
  1. Glædelig Jul og Godt Nytår! 
  2. Feliz Navidad y Próspero Año Nuevo! 
  3. Schéi Feierdeeg an e Gudde Neit Joer!
  4. Eguberri eta Urteberri On!
  5. Meli Hollidei Mich Saehae Bog Manh-i Bad-euseyo!
  6. Na Laethanta Saoire Merry Agus an Bhliain Nua Shona!
  7. Limnandi Zeeholide Kunye NoNyaka Omtsha Onoyolo!
  8. Veseli Praznitsi i Chestita Nova Godina! 
  9. Aleatalat Milad Saeid Wasanat Jadidat Saeida! 
  10. Mafaro Mazororo uye Nyaya Itsva Inofara!
  11. Shwinlaann Saw Aarrlautraat Myarr Nhaint Main g Lar Nhaitsait!
  12. Leholo Tsa Phomolo le Selemo se Secha se Thabile!
  13. Lebedik Holidays aun Mzl Niu Yar!
  14. Meera Chhuttiyaan aur Naya Saal Mbaarak Ho!
  15. Merry Holidays and Happy New Year! 
  16. HAPPY SATCHRPANGANHANKWANASH!
Interested in reading any of my zany books? Find them all on my Amazon Author Page.

Monday, December 17, 2018

Fact Check: Santa Claus

Yes, I can use a movie still without
copyright notice. This is from "Bad Santa."
I know, I know. Yule (you'll--get it?) have dozens of posts related to the inception of Santa Claus, Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, Pere Noel, Joulupukki (yes it is, look it up), Ded Moroz, Sinterklaas, Julenissen, and even Odin, etc. Many cite Saint Nicholas, the Greek Bishop who supposedly gave gifts to the poor. All this is set around the time of the winter solstice (also called Christmas, Solstice, Midwinter, Saturnalia, Letha, etc.).

It really doesn't make any difference since, of course, Santa is a delightful fiction for children to believe until their six or seven (some are duped for longer periods, some less).

When writing my Witches of Galdorheim series, I envisioned Santa as "that fat elf at the North Pole." the witches' complaint being that the dive bombing sleigh left reindeer manure all over their houses on the arctic island the witches made home. The result was a war between the witches and the Fat Elf until a truce was asserted.

Other than the mention of the fat elf, none of this side story made it into the series. Since I believe deeply (as much so as I believe in fairies), I wanted to resurrect this missing piece of the manuscript. It's too late to include in "Bad Spelling," since it's been published umpteen times. Still, I like it and I want to share it with you as a Holiday Gift. My writing unsullied by an editor's hands.

From the original (almost lost) text of "Bad Spelling"

The fat elf living at the North Pole flew his reindeer-driven sleigh over the island once too many times. Aunt Thordis had enough of reindeer manure sprinkling the rooftops.  The fertilizer mixed with the grain the reindeer ate sprouted a fine crop of grass on their traditional thatched roofs.  It was almost impossible to clean off.  Magic could clean up after real reindeer, but the enchanted ones left droppings that the villagers had to remove by hand.

The supposedly jolly elf just sneered at Aunt Thordis when she asked, ever so politely, if he’d take a different route. She returned to Galdorheim swearing revenge.  She got it on the next December’s flyover.  Blasting the sleigh, the elf, all nine reindeer, and a huge bag of gifts out of the sky gave the witch tremendous satisfaction.  She chased the red-suited little twerp all the way back to the North Pole and the coven got a good supply of reindeer meat.

The fat elf retaliated, of course.  He’d fly his reindeer sleigh over on the off season and encouraged them to let loose right over the village. The war escalated for several months.  Finally, each side sent emissaries to settle for peace.  Fatso (who went by a variety of aliases), promised to take a different route and not fly over the island.  Aunt Thordis promised she wouldn’t kick his fat butt to the South Pole: an equitable agreement in Thordis’s eyes.

* * *

You can get your very own copy of "Bad Spelling" and the rest of the books in the Witches of Galdorheim series. Or you can just buy "Bad Spelling" then work up from there.


COMPLETE SERIES FOR ONLY $12.64 (that's a lot of discounting)

BAD SPELLING - Book 1 of The Witches of Galdorheim Series
A klutzy witch, a shaman's curse, a quest to save her family. Can Kat find her magic in time?

In Paperback (Amazon enjoys discounting this book without telling me, but it's discounted at the time I wrote this post).
Audiobook (Also on Amazon)


Saturday, December 15, 2018

Christmas Weirdness 3

Continuing the Weird Christmas Traditions for your entertainment. See the First Part here and the Second Part here.
  • Latvia: A group of "mummers" travel from house to house where they are given a treat in return for their blessing. This sounds more like Halloween to me.
  • Guatemala: Folks sweep out their houses and put all the dirt in a communal pile with an effigy devil on top which is then burned. This must be an "out with the evil" gesture.
  • Cuba: Every December, Cuban city Remedios hosts the Parrandas Festival. The city splits in half, with each side building the biggest, baddest, fanciest light sculpture display ever. My husband does this by himself every year. No competition so far.
  • Bavaria: Bavarian Highlanders dressed in lederhosen fire mortars into the air. Sure, why not? 
  • Greece: The evil goblins, the Kallikantzaroi, lurk in the depths of the earth until Christmas Eve, when they spring up to create havoc. I wonder if anybody has seen this. It seems it'd be a great tourist draw.
  • Slovakia: The most senior man of the house takes a spoonful of loksa pudding and flings it to the ceiling. The more that sticks, the better. What is it with weird things to do with pudding?
  • Japan: Christmas cards are also a Japanese tradition, but they never ever are red. Red, of course, is the color for funerals. I suppose that means the cards could have lots of black, making them dual purpose for Halloween as well.
  • Canada: The Canadian postal service recognizes the address "SANTA CLAUS, THE NORTH POLE, CANADA HO HO HO." Letters addressed this way are opened and replied to by the well-known Royal Canadian Mounted Elves.
  • Finland: Holiday cards have tributes to the dearly departed. Finnish Cemeteries are lit with Christmas lights, making them a lovely sight on Christmas night.
  • Iceland: The kids leave a shoe on their windowsill for the 12 Days of Christmas. Each night, some Finnish elves fill the shoes with candy and other goodies. I like the Finnish elves. They're a generous lot.
  • England: Stockings are hung by the chimney with care with hopes St. Nicholas doesn't just leave a lump of coal.
  • South Africa: A little rotter named Danny ate all of Santa's cookies, the legend goes. Granny wasn't happy about this and killed Danny for being a greedy little punk. This is far worse than getting a lump of coal.
  • United States: In many cities, the Running of the Santas, draws a large crowd of spectators as the Santas rush from pub to bar to tavern getting as drunk as they can on the free drinks provided by the owners of the establishments. Of course, they sell a lot of drinks to the folks who want to watch the Santas get smashed.
That's all the weird stuff I have for now. If I find more, I'll most certainly add it to the lists. In the meantime, consider books as the perfect gift for any friend or member of the family.

TALES OF A TEXAS BOY is just the right present for that hard-to-shop-for older relative. Kids like it, too, but the main character's Texas drawl might be a hard read. They would like you to read it to them OR get the audio book edition and let the talented Donnie Baarns do the narration honors.
  • It's nostalgic
  • It doesn't have any sex (well, there is that thing with the jackass)
  • It's in LARGE PRINT
  • It's funny
  • It's poignant
  • It has lots of animals
  • It's a bargain in the books section
Buy it at Amazon for only $8.99 and make everybody happy. Now isn't that a better gift than cologne? Oh, you can also get the book for your Kindle, other ereader, or for your listening pleasure in audio format. Gotcha covered for Christmas.

Amazon Kindle Ebook $2.99
Large Print Paperback $8.99 at Amazon
Regular Print Paperback $6.99 at Amazon
Audio Book also on Amazon

Little Eddie tells some almost true Tall Tales set in West Texas of the 1930s. Guess what's true and what Eddie fudged on. Was it about the bear? Cage McNatt's prize sow? The skunk in the cornpatch? Guaranteed for a chuckle and maybe a tear here and there.



Wednesday, December 12, 2018

Christmas Weirdness 2

Continuing the Weird Christmas Traditions for your entertainment. See the First Part here.
  • Estonia: The whole family hits the sauna on Christmas Eve.
  • Wales: Someone is chosen to play Mari Lywd who walks through town with the skull of a horse on a stick. I'm baffled by this one.
  • Iceland: I like this one. If an Icelander doesn't get new clothes before Christmas, the killer mountain Yule cat eats them. 
  • Czech Republic: Desperate for marriage it seems. Czech ladies throw a shoe over one shoulder from the door way. The direction the shoe is pointed determines if they'll be married in the coming year.
  • Estonia: The whole family hits the sauna on Christmas Eve.
  • Wales: Someone is chosen to play Mari Lywd who walks through town with the skull of a horse on a stick. I'm baffled by this one.
  • Iceland: I like this one. If an Icelander doesn't get new clothes before Christmas, the killer mountain Yule cat eats them. 
  • Sweden: Authorities in the village of Gävle decided to install a straw goat statue in the town square. Every other year, somebody burns it down before Christmas. Both are fine traditions.
  • Sweden (again): Rice pudding is standard fare for dessert. The Christmas special has an almond buried somewhere in it. The lucky person who finds it will supposedly get married within a year. I assume only single folks of marrying age have a go at the pudding.
  • Great Britain: Speaking of puddings, tradition calls for each member of the household to stir the pudding in a clockwise direction while making a wish. I guess that's better than a lump of coal.
  • Italy: A witch named Befana is the deliverer of presents to children (not that stodgy Santa). But the kids have to wait for the blessings of Befana until January 6th.
  • Ethiopia: Christian Ethiopians celebrate Christmas on January 7th. Everybody wears white and the guys play ganna, a fast pace game of ... hockey?
More weird stuff coming here in the next couple of days.

TALES OF A TEXAS BOY is just the right present for that hard-to-shop-for older relative. Kids like it, too, but the main character's Texas drawl might be a hard read. They would like you to read it to them OR get the audio book edition and let the talented Donnie Baarns do the narration honors.
  • It's nostalgic
  • It doesn't have any sex (well, there is that thing with the jackass)
  • It's in LARGE PRINT
  • It's funny
  • It's poignant
  • It has lots of animals
  • It's a bargain in the books section
Buy it at Amazon for only $8.99 and make everybody happy. Now isn't that a better gift than cologne? Oh, you can also get the book for your Kindle, other ereader, or for your listening pleasure in audio format. Gotcha covered for Christmas.

Amazon Kindle Ebook $2.99
Large Print Paperback $8.99 at Amazon
Regular Print Paperback $6.99 at Amazon
Audio Book also on Amazon

Little Eddie tells some almost true Tall Tales set in West Texas of the 1930s. Guess what's true and what Eddie fudged on. Was it about the bear? Cage McNatt's prize sow? The skunk in the cornpatch? Guaranteed for a chuckle and maybe a tear here and there.



Sunday, December 09, 2018

Christmas Weirdness 1

Christmas, Noel, Jul. A pagan holiday preempted by Christian monks to make their story more palatable to the heathens. Well, Christmas is even weirder than that. Check out Christmas traditions around the world you might not know. Then, look at the bottom of this post to get the links to my book which is the absolutely most fantastically wonderful present you can buy for cheap. Trust me. Aunt Mabel will love it. So, on to the weird with this from Faux Channel. TALES OF A TEXAS BOY is just the right present for that hard-to-shop-for relative.

  • Greenland: Their own version of a Turducken is a Mattak. That's raw whale skin served with blubber) or Kiviak: 500 Auk birds stuffed into a sealskin and fermented for 7 months. I think I'll skip Greenland's Christmas.
  • South Africa: Sauteed caterpillar of the Emperor Moth is a Christmas treat.
  • Austria: Krampus! See my previous post on the esteemed Christmas guy worse than the Grinch.
  • Catalonia: The Nativity scenes includes a picture of a pooping man. Um. Along with the pooping guy, they have a pooping log. Now, I don't know about you, but I think Catalonia got too much bug spray sometime in the past.
  • Norway: Brooms are hidden away so witches can't claim possession. What's a witch without a broom? Kelly Conway?
  • Japan: The dine-out place of choice is KFC. Makes sense to me.
  • Venezuela: The religious go to Mass on roller skates.
  • Germany: They hide a pickle in the Christmas tree. The kid who finds it gets an extra gift.
  • New Zealand: Not so weird, they use a Pohutukawa tree rather than the standard Douglas fir. They're actually kind of pretty with red flowers.
  • Portugal: The Deceased are invited to dinner and have places set at the table for them. What the heck? They don't eat much.
  • Germany: Kids leave a sneaker outside to be stuffed with candy. Bad kinder get a twig instead.
  • Ukraine: Trees are decorated with an artificial spider and a bunch of spider web. Sounds like the Trump Whitehouse decor.
  • Czech Republic: Desperate for marriage it seems. Czech ladies throw a shoe over one shoulder from the door way. The direction the shoe is pointed determines if they'll be married in the coming year.
More weird stuff coming here in the next couple of days.

Now, back to my book, which is much more important.
  • It's nostalgic
  • It doesn't have any sex (well, there is that thing with the jackass)
  • It's in LARGE PRINT
  • It's funny
  • It's poignant
  • It has lots of animals
  • It's a bargain in the books section
Buy it at Amazon for only $8.99 and make everybody happy. Now isn't that a better gift than cologne? Oh, you can also get the book for your Kindle, other ereader, or for your listening pleasure in audio format. Gotcha covered for Christmas.

Amazon Kindle Ebook $2.99
Large Print Paperback $8.99 at Amazon
Regular Print Paperback $6.99 at Amazon
Audio Book also on Amazon

Little Eddie tells some almost true Tall Tales set in West Texas of the 1930s. Guess what's true and what Eddie fudged on. Was it about the bear? Cage McNatt's prize sow? The skunk in the cornpatch? Guaranteed for a chuckle and maybe a tear here and there.



Thursday, December 06, 2018

Merry Krampus Nacht!

Of course, we all love Santa Claus (or Santa Claws from "Nightmare Before Christmas"), but leave us not forget the adorable Krampus. After all, without Krampus, bad children wouldn't just get coal in their stocking, but they'd also be kidnapped, thrown into a sack, and eaten by the lovely Krampus. The Grinch ain't got nothin' on Krampus.

Here's some stuff from Wikipedia:

In folklore, Krampus is a horned, anthropomorphic figure described as "half-goat, half-demon", who, during the Christmas season, punishes children who have misbehaved, in contrast with Saint Nicholas, who rewards the well-behaved with gifts.

Krampus is one of the companions of Saint Nicholas in several countries including Austria, Bavaria, Croatia, Czech Republic, Hungary, Slovenia, South Tyrol and parts of Northern Italy. The origin of the figure is unclear; some folklorists and anthropologists have postulated its pre-Christian origin.

In traditional parades and in such events as the Krampuslauf (English: Krampus run), young men dressed as Krampus participate; such events occur annually in most
As evil as jolly Saint Krampus is, his role of getting naughty children to behave has worked wonders in the Slavic areas of Europe.

Now, if you don't have a child to traumatize for life with the story of Krampus, maybe you'd rather give a very nice present to an older person in your family (Grandma or Grandpa). TALES OF A TEXAS BOY is just the right present for that hard-to-shop-for relative.
  • It's nostalgic
  • It doesn't have any sex (well, there is that thing with the jackass)
  • It's in LARGE PRINT
  • It's funny
  • It's poignant
  • It has lots of animals
  • It's a bargain in the books section
Buy it at Amazon for only $8.99 and make everybody happy. Now isn't that a better gift than cologne? Oh, you can also get the book for your Kindle, other ereader, or for your listening pleasure in audio format. Gotcha covered for Christmas.

Amazon Kindle Ebook $2.99
Large Print Paperback $8.99 at Amazon
Regular Print Paperback $6.99 at Amazon
Audio Book (also available on Amazon)

Little Eddie tells some almost true Tall Tales set in West Texas of the 1930s. Guess what's true and what Eddie fudged on. Was it about the bear? Cage McNatt's prize sow? The skunk in the cornpatch? Guaranteed for a chuckle and maybe a tear here and there.