Chrihanakudwanzsaturneid

Tis the season, as they say. Season for what?

Christmas: A conversion of the mid-winter Saturnalia Festival. St. Patrick was big on keeping the frolicking holidays, but bending them to his own purpose. Historical records seem to place the actual birth of Jesus in March or April.

Hanakkuh: Festival of Lights for those of the Judaic persuasion. Probably irritated by the Christians trying to usurp this general time period. The Jews should really try to keep their holiday separate from Christmas, so as to not besmirch their own observance. Anyone want a hanakkuh bush?

Kwanzaa: Created in 1966, Kwanzaa was made up by a California guy to highlight African-American culture. Cool thought, but I'd just as soon we'd say: "What? Obama is black? Wow, I didn't know that." Keeping separate ensures separateness.

Saturnalia: The Romans liked mid-winter to celebrate something, so Saturn got the festival. This one was usurped for the Christmas myth. Don't get all twisted. Christmas is not a celebration for Jesus. It's a way to get the Pagans to sign up.

Eid ul-Adha: This is the Moslem day of celebration of Abraham not killing his son. Well, he would have killed his son, but God said intent was okay. This Moslem day is celebrated anywhere from late October to January. I think it's December 8th in 2008, so we missed it.

So, whatever you celebrate around this time of year, enjoy, be happy, don't drink too much.