I've Been Eviled

Evil Editor posted a shredding of my query letter. Since it takes a month or so to collect all the fake plots for a query, my REAL query is much improved. Still, EE's points are well-taken, even if he doesn't know that bound is the past tense of bind, in addition to 'going in the direction of'. Oh, well, nobody's perfect. Check it out at:

Evil Editor Shreds My Query

To rise to my defense, here's my query letter (at least the meaty part) after a lot of aid and assistance from the fine folk on the Query Tracker Forum. Feel free to make suggestions. I'm always fine-tuning.

Dear Lovely Agent Person:

[something here to show that this isn't a spam query, but that I know a bit about the agent] I hope that BAD SPELLING, a completed 44,000 word middle-grade fantasy, might appeal to you.

Katya wants to be a good witch, but her spells don’t just fizzle, they backfire with spectacular results, like when she tries to transform a rabbit into a frog and plasters the walls with green goo instead. She discovers that a shaman has put a curse on her father’s glacier- bound body, and it’s not only ruining her magic, but it’s spreading to the rest of her arctic island home. Katya and Rune, her half-vampire brother, race across the Barents Sea, fighting off polar bears, giants and magical attacks. Leaving the curse behind, she discovers her magical affinity with animals. She must use her newfound skill to confront the evil shaman and stop him from destroying her home and family. . .never mind burning her at the stake.

[paragraph boasting of my many writing credits]

Love,
Marva